Thursday, January 28, 2010

Peace At Last

Haaayyyyy... After 2 weeks of unexplained changes between us, we're finally OK. We were having fights and misunderstandings recently and I thought the fights would never end. I almost gave up, like the same loser that I was. It almost lead to me asking to just split up... :-( But good thing that I have a strong partner. Well, I just hate it when I feel jealous with someone. It eats me up alive and the feeling sucks. So most often than not, when I feel jealous, I just let it go because I hate the feeling. What's funny is that when I spoke to one of my exes, he told me that I was not like this during our time. According to him, I was the girl who would just ask if the rumors are true and whether or not it is, I break up with my boyfriend, go... just like what I did to him. That made me smile... the idea that I have changed a lot in this relationship makes me feel that this must be worth all that I went through in the past months like his crazy ex who argued with me over her TOR, then his bestfriend who's a girl, his other ex who was texting him saying she needs someone to talk to and all those... 8 months felt like years.

After the fights we had, I felt that I can't go on having arguments with him so might as well, end it. But after I said that, he talked to me sincerely explaining things and telling me that having fights in a relationship is still considered healthy. That it was our chance to say what we wanted to say... And it happens in every relationship. I have to understand that fighting with each other doesn't mean that we also stopped loving each other. Other than that, he admitted the fact that he once had a lot of relationships, but now that he's 29, he feels that he has gone over that stage and wanted a more stable relationship. He told me that it's the first time that his family liked his girlfriend... And that his past doesn't matter because he already learned from it and what's important would be what we are now.

Talking to another friend of mine who just got married last October with his long time girlfriend, I asked him how to deal with a relationship that's on the rocks and he said that relationships are always on the rocks. The key to surviving is a good communication. Always be open to each other. Spend time together, no cellphones to disturb the moment... and also take time away from each other to see if you miss the person when he's away or if you love him only when you see him. That was a good advice... I just realized that lately, we really don't have any chance to talk things out. I have a different shift and what happens is that by the time he gets home, I'm still asleep and by the time I wake up, he's asleep because he has to be at work around 3am. I have to go to work on a Saturday and during Sundays, we only go out for a movie or dinner and then go home as early as we can because I don't have keys and my mom would be sleeping early because most of the my family members need to go to school or work early Monday morning. During Mondays, we don't see each other because it's either he has some documents to fix or meet up with a seller for camera stuff while I do my thing like grocery or just spend time with Mom and do errands.

It was a lesson learned from the misunderstandings that we had. It was for the best. We might be fighting but that doesn't change the fact that WE STILL LOVE EACH OTHER... We still want to stay together. Funny thing is that we ended up crying because of the fight so that night, we had big red eyes. hahahahahahaha....

Sorry Hon, peace na tayo. :-)

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