So of course, I'm officially a mid-20's girl. WOOT! hahahahaha
In line with this, I'd like to say some things that I am thankful for which I guess, I forget to be thankful for everyday. I was talking to my Mom the other day and was asking her if she ever reached a point when she felt that it's tiring to live life. She was so surprised at my question and told me that everyday, people who are sick are praying for another day to live. Guess I wasn't too appreciative after all. Stress was taking its toll at me. I have to admit that lately, some factors contributed to the "loneliness". Life was imperfect. It always has been and I was seeing it clearly and forgetting that after all, I have lived this way and that I will continue to because that's how life is. I fail, I get hurt. But despite all those, everyday when I wake up, I am given a new hope to change my path. To take things with refreshed energy just because I can. Taking on life is never easy but who would have thought it's gonna be this hard? I have lost so many battles even though I never wanted to. I have given more than what was required of me only to realize that it wasn't enough. So I have questioned, what's there to live for after all?
But then of all things that I have noticed, I overlooked such wonderful things that make life worth living. A Family that cares and loves unconditionally. Friends that never left me behind despite the differences in so many things or the changes of locations and paths in life. The everyday opportunities that I was given to make a difference. Life. Is. Wonderful. And maybe, I forget it sometimes. Of all things, I forgot that life is wonderful. Where's little miss sunshine gone? Why should I be faking a laugh or a smile when I can be laughing in all honesty? I also forget that I am such a wonderful person. I tend to see my flaws more often than what my good qualities are. I can't cook but I appreciate every meal regardless of what it is. I can't make firm decisions but then I am very flexible to meet the needs of people that I need to satisfy. I always believe in goodness of people even if they lie to me or cheat me. I forgive over and over. I believe that people can and will always change so I don't take past mistakes against anyone. I give and give as much as I can or sometimes, even if I can't anymore because I do not value anything with price. I don't fear losing money or losing my job because I believe that I can live without it and I'd still be the same person. I was never afraid to go hungry or live in the streets because after all, other people survived that kind of life. I am wonderful after all. In fact, those little things about me are enough to make my life worth living. In fact, I have touched people's lives in countless ways that I never thought I would. In fact, I am actually thankful and always should be.
So today, as I celebrate my 25th year, I still do not understand why I am still here. Funny thought is that God can take away all that I have and all that I am but he still hasn't because maybe, I am yet to fulfill my purpose in life. I could get hit by a truck, I could die of some disease, I could fall off a building, but then it would be too easy for me. I would die without meaning and that was never His plan. And that maybe, all the disappointments and pain I have experienced are part of the plan. It's meant to be that way because if it wasn't, I wouldn't be taking the path that I should be taking.
Happy Birthday to me. Happy living. It is a wonderful life and I guess, I should always remember that. On my 25th year, I should continue to live, love and forgive. I should continue to have Faith. I should live this awesome life to the best that I could, as much as I can.